Evidence

I look up, as I often do, while taking a shower and see, as I always do, a surface crack in the ceiling leading to the skylight.  My usual thought is "decay; I need to repair the decay."  My new thought today is that the crack, not a smooth, unblemished surface, is really the "normal."

 I have often reflected that we strive toward, build toward perfection and once we reach that lofty peak, if we do, it is but a small speck on which to stand, like the tip of a pyramid.  And like a pyramid, once we have scaled one side and reached the precarious top, we have nowhere to go but down the other side.  Once we have built our "perfection," time and nature begin immediately chipping away, altering, decaying, destroying that perfection we have built.  And so we spend endless hours and energy trying to forestall the inevitable.

Today I had a different thought.  Today rather than seeing the crack as evidence of decay, I see it simply as evidence of life's cycles.  The crack is as much a part of the plan as is the smooth surface.  It is perhaps of equal value in the cycle if we withhold judgment from the process.

And so I am that crack if I look at my biological cycle.  I have passed the tip of perfection and my body is slowly changing in a different direction.  I could say that I am slowly decaying but that would then place judgment on the process.  It is merely evidence that I still "am."

As for cycle of "me" ~ my heart, my soul, my mind ~ I am still building the smooth surface of wisdom and I have yet to reach the peak.  It is evidence that I am still "to be."