Not in Control and Not Liking It

More Lessons from the Garden

The work on the back yard remodel reveals a personal weakness (or two).  Actually, not-being-in-control-of-the-work-on-the-back-yard, is more correct.  I am helpless and ineffectual in moving progress forward toward completion.  It's all in my husband's hands.  And since the back yard is so small, all I see is demolition everywhere and it makes me jittery ~ okay, it makes me cranky.

I am not in control.  I don't like it.  What a pathetic confession.  What a revealing confession.  The truth is I have much to say about the back yard remodel.  I will do most of the designing, choosing of the new water feature, and choice and placement of plants.  What is out of control is time ~ the time it will take from destruction to completion, from foxhole to Eden. 

My husband and I  have vastly different approaches to time.  When he says it will take three days, I know that means three weeks of cumulative time.  It may actually take only 72 hours of work but it will be spread out over the course of three weeks.  This is nothing new.  We have clashed on our mutual perceptions of time from the beginning of our courtship.  You would think that one of us would have learned (his) lesson by now, and be more accommodating and understanding of (me).

My mantra for the next several weeks ~ serenity now ~ let go and be at peace with the process ~ joy in the journey ~ blah, blah, blah.