I Am Me

I met an elderly woman this week who in my mind is beautiful and worthy of being accepted for who she is ~ despite a recent stroke and heart attack ~ rather than being branded as someone who used to keep a perfect house, made prize-worthy meals and dressed impeccably.  I found her witty and charming.  Granted, I didn't know her then so I have nothing to compare her to now but maybe that's how it should be.

Why is it we often refer to an aging or chronically ill or newly disabled person as the person they used to be?  Why is it we can't allow this person the dignity of being who they are now?  It seems to me that he or she then becomes frozen in what was rather than rejoicing in what is.